Cabin in Space

The scene is a remote cabin flying in the middle of Outer Space with 4 people in it hanging around, all of them totally unawares that when they look outside the window they won't see the neighborhood they think they live in, but rather Outer Space.

 To them its just another normal night in the cabin...drinking a bit of wine..smokin a little bit of puff.. watching TV and eating potato chips and pizza...shootin the shit.

The man Donovan, who is going to be the first character in the play to discover that they're floating in space, is in the kitchen heating up pizza in the microwave, the girl Trish is in the bathroom, on the toilet, more than a bit stoned,  reading the National Geographic, the young boy Johnny is in the spare room of the cabin playing football on the TV, and finally there is the dude Arnold, who is on the couch in the living room watching an old black and white film drinking wine.

They've been in the cabin all day,as it was raining most of the day, and the cabin itself was, in fact, sitting in its normal spot in Reality, until about 5 PM...when a fierce thunderstorm began and .. zapped it (becasue I, the Lord your God, wanted it to be zapped) out of the regular suburban reality it had sat in 150 years since being built in approx. 1867, into outer space.

The inhabitants of course, our beloved characters, they did not hear the blast, they did not at all take note of it, and the first one to notice is going to be Donovan, as said, because he's going to realize that the trashcan is full, and he's going to wrap it up,  tie the bag in a knot and go to take it outside, and the moment he swings open the back door he's going to of course notice immediately that...well...nohing at all is out there, except dark empty SPACE, with absolutely nothing at all in it.

 Fortunately he's going to take note of the fact that nothing at all is out there , before he takes so much as a step outside the back door. Our character Donovan is going to notice before stepping out there to his death  because I like him and, as his God, I don't want to kill him in that way. I in fact may even want to help him, but not the others, escape the cabin, and get back to Earth.....

But  what if I decide not to? What if I decide to ruin these characters? What will happen once they realize that they are all trapped in a cabin floating in outer space? Will they...maybe..kill each other with the only weapons available in the house, those being steak knives - as a result of losing their minds? Will they get down on their knees and begin to worship Me, God, begging to be saved and sent back to their everyday lives, as they had been before, on that residential street ? Imagine how much you would yearn, dear reader, to look out of your window and see everything normal again, if you woke up one morning and looked out your window and saw it was just....boom..."blank empty space". Hence I can't imagine  what our-my- characters, willdo....

Will  they maybe start screaming and yelling and trying to figure out just how it wound up happening, hoping that they can come up with some solution ? (I won't permit that to happen).  Or  maybe they will descend into that area of the human psyche where , of course, they will perhaps not believe that it is in fact happening, but that it is instead just some sort of illusion or a hallucination they are having? How or what could perhaps be done here , and inserted, in order to make the inhabitants of this cabin floating out in space realize that what is happening to them is very real? Ah! I, the Lord their God, suddenly have an idea! Should I perhaps insert and/or throw some strange character outside the house (yes, a character simply floating in space) and have him/her knock and bang on the door, or maybe it even blow it open with a bolt action shotgun? A villain! Of course! Should i maybe make that character look 100 percent identical to Donovan or Trisha or Arnold etc? So a sort of strange paranormal twin phenomenon starts to play out - where they start to see themselves , talking to themselves, or maybe some person who walks in an out of the mirror, screaming , their skin on fire, with some strange lizard mask on their face? Should I make the character who breaks into the house decidedly not human? Say, some sort of monster, like a flesh eating alien, or a Tyrannosaurous rex, or a witch, a wizard??

Should I be mean to these 4 people I've created and, as of yet, written no back story or history for??  Or should i be kind? I suppos I could , if i were so inclined, considering I am omnipotent and everything, take the cabin and plop it down somewhere else ... not space..not earth...but somewhere beautiful .. like a rainforest planet, where I'll then force the 4 characters to live (for eternity, of course) or an Underworld planet , where they'll be forced to fight demons and flaming warlocks, for a thousand long years?  Or...better yet...what if I just start doing absolutely horrifici things to the characters once they realize that the cabin is definitely in space? For example, I might decide to start making Donovans head shrink, or have his skin turn from white to black to dark red, to then havin strange green pus shoot of his ears ... and then he gets a terribly horrific headache and falls to the kitchen floor, pounding his fists down upon it and screaming "HELP! ANYONE HELP ME! HELP ME! I DONT WANNA DIE!" as all of the other characters watch in abject horror until...BOOM!

 Donovan's big fat body suddenly explodes , and his brains and his blood and guts explodes all over everything in the kitchen and, lo and behold, one moment after that, what the hell is happening to Donovan's brains, blood, and guts!? Little rapidly multiplyign insects, ants, lizards, and even strange miniature wolves are popping up out of it and now chasing everyne around the house!

The audience will watch and laugh with glee   as the girl Trisha gets both her arms torn off by a feisty, hungry grey wolf, and someone will literally choke to death with laughter on buttery popcorn (for now this is all being filmed and broadcast on FOX) as they watch the kid Johnny crash through one of the living room windows, as a wolf chases him, and though he floats in outer space for a few minutes after he crashes through the window...he will then find himself, moments later, at the bottom of a deep dark l ake, a lake which has been frozen over, and it is there I will trap him, until he drowns, frantically, and desperately. As for Arnold, the last one living, I will make him walk over back to the kitchen , where of course those steak knives are kept on the counter, and he will grab the biggest one and .... you will be on your couch watching screaming "ARNOLD NO!" but .. of course, you have no omnipotence here, only I ... and so Arnold will thrust the biggest steak knife on the counter right through his throat, and somehow he will even manage to decapitate himself ... the FOX audience will watch in horror as his decapitated entirely sheared off hits the floor and .... what then? What happens then? I'll tell you, but promise me you won't be too surprised, or , depending upon your religion, shocked and offended: The door to the kitchen will swing open and Jesus Christ will come in,, dressed in the robes he's always dressed in, and he will kneel at the side of Arnolds destroyed, mangled, and bloody corpse, and he will do the sign of the Cross, mumbling in old and very guttural Arabic...he will say the "Hail Mary", and when he gets done saying it, and stands back up, guess what?

Arnold will be alive again, standing there in the kitchen as though nothing at all has happened, he will not see Jesus because Jesus will scurry off to the backroom and disappear (after taking a quick leak in the toilet and stealing a blunts worth of weed from a drawer) and Arnold will then, for a second, think he had a terrible nightmare (where he thought his cabin was floating in outer space) and...what then? Here's what: when he goes to look out the window, his heart beat skipping for a second, thinking he'll see nothing but blackness, he will instead see a little kid with a clown mask on, honking a bicycle horn, passing his car on the front lawn, with  a bit of rain drizzle coming down. He will hear a fire engine siren go off in the distance and he will realize that "it was just a thought arnold, just a weird, paranoid thought, now you're fine..". He will then plop himself down in front of the Computer and bring up Microsoft Word and .....

He will start writing this exact story, that I have already written here, except he will write it - where - but over there.... and therefore Arnolds fat little white hairy fingers will slowly begin to type, into the Word terminal:

The scene is a remote cabin flying in the middle of Outer Space with 4 people in it hanging around, all of them totally unawares that when they look outside the window they won't see the neighborhood they think they live in, but rather Outer Space.