Plaid

If we are to have a discussion about fashion, then the first thing that I must focus on is that, for whatever reason, I am positively and absolutrly 100 percent obsessed with plaid. And I do not mean just slightly.

I mean that I am deeply obsessed with plaid and I love it no matter where I see it, on literaly any article of clothing. If I was a chick ....(edit)

If I was so phenomenally lucky to have been born a woman and not a gruesome hideous man, I would probably wear plaid literally every day, in at lesst some form. Plaid skirts are obviously my Favorite (and I would say they are the most famous for lasses?) but I also obsess over full plaid dresses, flannels (of course!), and I also have a rather recent love for yellow & plaid heels & bows , scarves, et cetera. I imagine myself (I'm giggling) as some freckled golden haired woman named Elizabeth or Courtney or Brixley or something, walking around in the wood in my plaid skirt just above my knees, oh so clean..and nice knee high plaid heels to match it..maybe even a sash to go along with it. What will I be doing out there you ask...? Looking for my king - what else? You can imagine me just skipping along back then in the woods of - where..Cairn Gorm..whistling as the wind pushes up my oh so cute plaid skirt and ..ahaha...all the big rough knights in that big armor....theyd all be in the woods, hiding, just watching in awe as I went skipping by with my little pale white legs....my divine freckled face...

I guess we'd have to make it some incredible sorceress would bless my plaid skirt? So it'd be magical. Men would see it ...them big Knights ...and they'd just fall head over heels instantly with me. "Slaughter thy wife, man." Id say in my little voice. "Yes m'lady."

Anyways though..(yu see what plaid does to me!?)...one reason I find this particular fashion style intriguing from an "historical" point of view is because plaid acrually isn't as utterly random as it initially might seem to modern eyes . It turns out that it has an origin and of course that origin is Scottish.

See...I knew that plaid was Scottish all along i think, because I saw Braveheart with the kilts and those sashes and all that, it was obvious; but I...I don't think I had ever really completely gripped that plaid was actually royal or something over there , which apparently it was. I didn't realize that it had all of its history, like, solely there and that it meant as much as it apparently does to the culture. Who knows why? My guess is that it was probably the hardest material to make back then (I've no idea?) But yea...Royal origins. And what I find so fascinating is that if you look even now at where it tends to show up you'll see it still does almos seem to have a royal feel to it.

Flannel, for instance, doesn't look Royal at all, and if anything is a mark of the low class here, but plaid dresses and especially the oh so famous Burberry plaid (I'd make my Oscar speech in Burberry) is insanely high class looking. This is also the case when it comes to plaid skirts which are worn by the snooty private school people from here to Asia, and of course the scarves are a whole other type of snootiness that is usually just bordering on drive you insane with rage and attraction madness, like all high class stuff. The gingham dress (which to me just seems like plaid) is often worn by  the highest class of women around it would seem.

And , well, keeping all of this high class and Royal background in mind, one can't help but admit that there is something devilishly enjoyable about imagining a woman in some very clean and prim plaid outfit of some kind doing very devilishly dirty things. For me it has always been far more fun to envision women in these "conservative" type outfits doing wild things just because you wouldn't expect it from them. It's not to say I want to get rid of the "liberal " outfits (helllll no I don't) ..it just means to say it's pretty funny to imagine a woman in some long plaid skirt (they call it "tartan" in these circles) getting it hiked all the way up by some sweaty biker dude and then..Boom! Taking it right up her rear. Like me when I'm Courtney MacKenzie in the Scottish woods. Every warriors hands will be up my skirt....

I have a memory for instance though  from my sophomore year of high school of this teacher who was  about 25 or so, and she was considered very good looking, and ...ill never forget, and I swear to this tale, but I had just gotten transferred into the class and one day during a test I was sitting there after I had finished, and I glanced over at her, she was sitting at her desk you know, and she had a plaid skirt on I think, and I swear I saw that woman flash my 15 year old self her bare cunt. I swear to it. I'm even getting hot now wanting to touch my little thang thinking of it. She flashed me spreading her legs conpletely apart right under the desk and she had no panties on, nothing. I was in awe. And it's the weirdest memory ever because its like ...I've had it in my head for years now and I still don't quite believe it really happened almost but then I'm like ...it did...I saw Miss McKay flash me....

Shit what am I doing?? 😅 I'm so gay.